Happy Book Birthday to LAST YEAR'S MISTAKE!

You guys! It's here! June 9, 2015 is TODAY - and my book is officially out in the world!

The first pictures of my little book baby in the wild (aka the shelves at Barnes and Noble) were tweeted to me this weekend by Lauren Gibaldi and Lisa Maxwell. And yep, I totally choked up.

When I pulled myself together, I then threw on my Respect the Fluff t-shirt and hightailed it over to my nearest B and N, where I took this:

Pay no attention to the fact that I look like a Gremlin. Look only
at that gorgeous book beside me.

I honestly thought this day would never come, but now that it has, I have too many feels to even articulate. I'm humbled, flattered, touched, excited, nervous, a little harried, and well... you get the point.

Photo credit: Sourwolfpowers

First, I want to say THANK YOU to anyone and everyone who has either read, reviewed, tweeted, or showed any kind of excitement/support for LAST YEAR'S MISTAKE in any way. Knowing that people cared enough to read and spread the word about something I've written is mind-blowing.

Photo Credit: realitytvgifs

Second, everything I went through to get to this point is never far from my mind. Things can change on a dime, and I want to remind other authors who are feeling like it might never happen of this: You never know. No really. You Don't.

And since it *did* happen (nope, still not over it), there are three (well, four, if you count mine) blogs that have generously posted

interviews and/or giveaways in LYM's honor. Go to:

Reading is My Treasure for answers to Kaitlin Snider's fantabulous questions about LYM, and for the chance to win signed bookmarks and saltwater taffy (US only).

That Artsy Reader featured another set of fun interview questions for the Debut Dish, and is offering the chance to win a signed LYM hardcover and bookmark (INT).

Adventures in YA Publishing also has a hardcover copy up for grabs, along with some fantastic other titles.

And don't forget, today is the last full day to enter my own Pre-Release Giveaway Extravaganza! More details on how to win the prizes shown below can be found HERE.

If you like DEAR TEEN ME posts, mine is up on the PulseIt blog today. Click here to read.

Also, I want to give a special shout out to Eric Smith, for including LAST YEAR'S MISTAKE on Paste Magazine's list of 13 of the Best New YA Books in June, and to the New York Public Library for featuring LYM on its YA Summer Reading List. And to Sherry Lay, for making me this adorable piece of fan art from her favorite quote:

If you'd like to help me celebrate LYM's release, there are few ways you can do so.

One - help spread the word! I've put together a few tweets that can be copied and pasted for your convenience:

If you love YA contemporary romance, don't miss #LastYearsMistake, @gmc511's sweet tale of first love & 2nd chances!  http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1481432230/ref=s9_simh_gw_p14_d0_i1?pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_s=desktop-1&pf_rd_r=06944YBFNJJT2FCQ1EZ3&pf_rd_t=36701&pf_rd_p=2079475242&pf_rd_i=desktop

Love a will they/won't they romance between friends? @gmc511's #LastYearsMistake releases today! http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1481432230/ref=s9_simh_gw_p14_d0_i1?pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_s=desktop-1&pf_rd_r=06944YBFNJJT2FCQ1EZ3&pf_rd_t=36701&pf_rd_p=2079475242&pf_rd_i=desktop

Swoony, romantic #LastYearsMistake by @gmc511 is out today! Don't miss all these awesome chances to win it! www.writersblog-gina.blogspot.com

Two - buy the book! It's available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Indiebound, as well as in lots of book stores.

Three - if you like it, tell a friend. Or better yet, please leave a review on Amazon or Goodreads! Word of mouth is invaluable to helping get books in people's hands.

Four - come support me and LYM at one of my launch parties or signings! Click the Events and Appearances tab at the top of the page for more info - hopefully to updated with even more places to find me soon.

And once again, thank you so much to everyone who had read, or plans to read LAST YEAR'S MISTAKE. This is a life-long dream come true for me, and I'm so excited for you to share it with me!

Photo credit: foreverswiftly

The Big Impact of the Smaller Things

I think this post has been brewing for a while, but it was actually a non-writing related meltdown that made me realize it.

I took the day off on Friday to get a few things done, namely my glucose tolerance test and a tune-up for my car to make sure it's safe to drive to Georgia.

Things have been stressful in recent months, but I've really been trying to take everything in stride. Sure there have been tears along the way, but on Friday I was honestly convinced I might never stop crying.

And it was basically over the stupidest thing ever.

In my defense, in addition to the things in the links above, I'd consumed enough sugar for 3 people, I'd worked late the past two weeks, gotten all kinds of aggravation from unaccommodating doctors offices in GA, and on top of it all, I had a wicked, can't-get-more-than-two-feet-from-a-box-of-tissues-or-you're-in-trouble cold.

All relatively small things, in and of themselves.

And then, to make a long story short, my doctor's office screwed up a prescription refill and I got stuck paying for a medication I'll never take, all because they didn't follow instructions.

We're only talking about a $25 copay here. But guys, between stress and not feeling well, I melted down like they'd just stripped me of my entire life's savings. The tears just kept on coming.

When I talked to my husband he said, "Babe, it's only a prescription, it's not a big deal." I knew he was right, but that didn't stop it from feeling like a very big deal. It felt like confirmation that nothing would ever go right in my life ever again, because it had been so long since anything had.

It sounds dramatic, because most of us (myself included) know better than to sweat the little things. But when the little things keep piling up, they get heavier and heavier. And eventually, something is going to buckle under the weight.

But the moral of all this? Is that these are the exact moments I try to capture in my YA stories.

When the average person thinks back on his or her high school years, it's usually not one specific event or memory that evokes the misery and perfection of being a teenager - it's a culmination of many moments. Looking back on my own high school years, there really weren't any major events.

    

     Does it mean that nothing I went through didn't FEEL like a major event?

    

     That nothing I experienced didn't shape my way of thinking and acting for years to come?  

    

     That I can't still recall those moments of joy or anger or hurt as if they just happened yesterday?

 

Absolutely Not.

And this, THIS, is the exact reason I wrote the contemporary romance that got me my agent. I wanted a book that captured those first-relationship moments you never forget, because of how they made you FEEL.

The smiles and laughs that start to take on a different meaning until your insides squirm when you realize your feelings for someone extend beyond friendship.

The way it feels like you've been punched right in the gut the first time you see that person look at someone else the way you wish they'd look at you.

The magnitude of a kiss you've waited eons for.

The letdown of knowing it can't be anything more.

The devastation of believing you're inferior and worthless.

The invincible feeling of knowing you most certainly are NOT inferior or worthless, and no one ever has the right to make you feel that way, thank you very much.

Having no real certainty of where do I go from here?

Those, to me, are the moments that stand out from my teenage years, and the things that have never left my mind, even though they're not momentous by anyone else's definition. Unfortunately, novels that flesh out these kinds of moments are often branded "quiet," almost like it's a bad word.

I don't call them quiet. I call them "real."

It's a huge challenge to drum up major emotion from minor things, to create drama that's gripping and relatable without theatrics. To write something people will love just for the way it makes them feel. To create a story that's a collection of small things leaving a big impact.

Wasting 25 bucks on a botched prescription refill is not a big deal. Neither is developing a crush on someone. But they've FELT like big deals to all of us at one time or another, and when you can put that moment in context to make someone feel its significance all over again, that is no small feat as an author.

So no, I don't say "quiet" like it's a bad word when it comes to novels. I say it like it's something I'd love to see more of. I say it with respect.

 

I say it like it's an accomplishment. Because it is.



 

Your turn - what small moments in life have made the biggest impact on you and your writing? Which  novels have made a mark on you just for the way they made you feel (So I can go check them out RTFN)?



For the Love of Metaphor

I love finding metaphors in stories - it amazes me when something common or unassuming represents a much deeper meaning for a character as his or her story unfolds.

One of the recurring metaphors in my recently-completed ms, SHADOW PARK, is the sunset. And with a title like that, I should probably be embarrassed to admit that it was unintentional until the very end of the novel.

Those of you who follow me on Twitter know it makes sense that I'd find a way to make this everyday occurrence into something significant to my beloved main character, whether I meant to do it or not. Why, you ask?

Because I'm a little obsessed. And I have the pictures to prove it (All of these were taken with my cell phone):

Every night I stand by my front door and watch the sun sink into the horizon. It never fails to enthrall me. Stunning pinks and golds, clouds that appear lit from within, colors changing and shifting and igniting until the light finally dies. And I get to witness a new version of it, every. Single. Night.

The same and different, all at once. Endings and beginnings. Time moving forward.

Metaphor? YES PLEASE.

Your turn, peeps - tell me all about your favorite metaphors you've incorporated into your stories. Was it intentional, or happy coincidence?

Holy Crap, I Just Wrote A Novel

Happy Monday, Peeps!

Okay, if you're anything like me, I know what you're thinking - WTF is happy about Monday?

Well, even though I still have to drag my butt out of bed today to go to work, and even though I still have to get some form of dinner on the table when I get home, I'll still be smiling (barring disaster) BECAUSE:

I FINISHED THE FIRST DRAFT OF MY THIRD MANUSCRIPT!

Rock-N-Roll!

My nephew Evan rocks hardcore. It's in the genes.

Those of you who read my Writing Outside Your Comfort Zone post (and thank you, if you did) know that this one was particularly challenging for me. I decided halfway through to make it a romance AND a mind-bender, and I was terrified I'd screw it up.

Of course, it hasn't gone to my betas yet, so there's a good chance I *did* screw it up. But we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

But even if this ms hadn't been particularly involved, I'm pretty sure I'd still feel the same way about finishing it - The "Holy-Crap-I-Just-Wrote-A-Novel" High.

I've written three manuscripts. By now, it should be nothing new, right?

Except that all three times, it felt like I would never finish.

All three times, the word count seemed to creep up at a snail's pace, until I was sure I didn't have enough plot for a full-length novel.

All three times, I was juggling work and home and family and friends, and telling myself there weren't nearly enough hours in the day to ever get this done.

And all three times, I was dead wrong. Because finishing a manuscript is a huge deal, no matter what your situation, no matter if it's the third or the thirtieth. It's an accomplishment that no one else can take away from you.

It's a high well earned. And whether it sits in a drawer or makes it to the bookshelf, it's still the product of long hours and hard work and love poured into every page - it is something to be proud of.

I'd like to think that if I ever stop feeling the "Holy-Crap-I-Just-Wrote-A-Novel High, then that's when it's time to hang up my writing hat. Because I want to feel this way EVERY SINGLE TIME I write something...

...Right up until the ugly reality of revisions hits home. (Cue buzzkill music)

Have you felt the Holy-Crap-I-Just-Wrote-A-Novel High lately? Do you feel it every time? And most importantly - how do you celebrate?

"Inspired" To Talk About My Book!

The lovely and talented Dahlia has tagged me to be part of the Be Inspired Bloghop!

As I read the questions Dahlia answered about her own (amazing, hilarious) novel, I realized how rare it is that I actually talk about mine on this blog. I've mentioned that it's a contemporary romance and I've posted one or two excerpts, but other than that, I guess I'm a little superstitious.

Today, superstition is going out the window. Here are a few factoids about my Book Baby:

Q) What is the name of your book?
A) LAST YEAR'S MISTAKE

Q) Where did the idea for your book come from?
A) It started with a dream. I saw a girl and her boyfriend snuggling up against the lockers at school (because, apparently, I dream of strangers). Then the door at the end of the hall opened, and another boy walked in. The girl's face turned white and fell, and then she ran to him and threw her arms around him, leaving her boyfriend - and me - to wonder WTF had just happened. I built the rest of the story around that dream.

Q) In what genre would you classify your book?
A) Contemporary YA Romance

Q) If you had to pick actors to play your characters in a movie rendition of your book, who would you choose?
A) This is WAY easy.

Ashley Benson as Kelsey

Sean Faris and his biceps as David

Max Thieriot as Ryan

Q) Give us a one sentence synopsis of your book.
A) LYM is the story of Kelsey and David, and it alternates between events in the past that led to their friendship falling apart, and the unexpected way they come together again in the present – as more than friends, even though they both try to fight it.

Q) Is your book already published?
A) I WISH! It's currently on sub, so here's hoping!

Q) How long did it take you to write your book?
A) Wow, I didn't realize it until I looked back to answer this question, but almost a whole year.

I wrote the first scene in January of 2011. I was working on another ms, so I kind of let it simmer for a while and didn't write more until March. Then I hit a stalling point again over the summer (busy season at work, revising and querying my first project) and finally finished in December.

Q) What other books within your genre would you compare it to? (Or, readers of which books would enjoy yours?)
A) I'll be perfectly honest here - I have no idea. I've been told my writing is reminiscent of Sarah Dessen's, but I've actually never read one of her novels, so I can't agree or disagree. I do know that if you enjoy flawed but likable characters and high-tension romance all thrown into a pretty, historic setting, you'll like this novel :)

Q) Which authors inspired you to write this book?
A) Probably Stephanie Perkins. I remember so much hubub over ANNA AND THE FRENCH KISS, and when I read it, I kept thinking, Wait... this is a story all about romance. You can DO that? Really? JUST romance?...... I want to do that! I CAN do that!

Q) Tell us anything that might pique our interest in your book.
A) Well, first, go and scroll back on up to that photo of David. Now imagine him in a baseball uniform. Now imagine him shirtless and sopping wet. Because that happens in my book.

No, seriously, in my opinion, it's a fun, fast-paced, sometimes funny, sometimes angsty read that shows how the past can bite you in the ass while hitting on so many of the emotions we experience when falling in love for the first time. And the kissing scenes are hot, if I do say so myself!

That's all! I'm supposed to tag five more people to participate in the Blog Hop, but y'all know by now that I prefer not to obligate anyone. So if you'd like to answer these fun and easy questions, consider yourself tagged! And don't forget to tweet or comment with the link :)

Writing Outside Your Comfort Zone: AKA, What the Hell am I Doing?

Have any of you ever started a project, got halfway through, and found yourself thinking, what the hell am I doing?


That's where I am right now, peeps.

Most of you know the manuscript that landed my kickass agent was a contemporary romance. It makes perfect sense, considering I'm a romance junkie. I love reading it. I love writing it. If most other genres are coconut milk ice cream - enjoyable enough, a lot better for you, but just not quite as delicious - then a good romance is my ginormous bowl of real, chocolate-fudgey Ben and Jerry's dairy Heaven.

Yes, I really did do a photo shoot with a container of ice
cream. 

So why, I ask, am I attempting to write a psychological thriller right now?

I'll tell you.

When the idea for this manuscript came to me months ago, it was as a paranormal romance/thriller type novel.


I let the idea percolate while I finished LYM, but as time went on, it seemed agents and editors alike had started to regard "paranormal" as a four-letter word. (Click the link for a great post by Tristina Wright)

Then I had the amazing fortune to speak to John and the Other Awesome Offering Agent on the phone. The only not-so-awesome part? They both confirmed my fear that paranormal is getting the cold shoulder in the publishing market right now.

Cue instant, intense panic. And sadness, because I like a good supernatural story.

I'd already started writing SP as a paranormal and had about 20K down. There were no vampires, no werewolves, no shape-shifting unicorns or whatever - just a not-so-dead dead girl. I should be fine, right? It's all those *other* things that are crowding the bandwagon, right? RIGHT?

WHAT IN THE HELL WAS I GOING TO DO??


(And just a side note on bandwagons: if everyone didn't clamor for the same one at the same time, they wouldn't have to abandon ship en masse. Though I suppose that's the nature of a bandwagon. *sigh*)

I had ideas for new contemporary romances, but they were just twinkles in my eye at that point, and I am a sloooow drafter.

Cue copious hyperventilation.

I think it was my CP Dahlia who said, "Well... does SP *have* to be paranormal?" (Not kidding, guys, I associate with geniuses)

That's when it hit me: No it does not! I can morph this puppy into a psychological thriller while still keeping the basic structure of the premise AND all the sweet-n-steamy romance! Wahoo!


The only problem? It was WAY easier to write as a paranormal. Like, way.

Developing a main character people can be sympathetic toward while also questioning whether or not she's completely off her rocker has been daunting, to say the least.

Which is to say: this mc is driving me freaking crazy with all her psychological issues and all her damn "feels," because I'm the one who has to do them justice. My original vision was much more cut-and-dry.

I'm finding that when I sit down to write, I wind up staring at the blinking cursor with my bitch face, like so:

Seriously, SP? You can't write your damn self already?

On the other hand, when I do finally manage to pull off a scene that I've mulled over for hours or even days?

It's freaking awesome.

So while I'm still a bit miffed at paranormal being mean-girled out of the market as punishment for its own popularity, the upside is that it's been an opportunity to challenge myself as a writer. I might be kicking and screaming every step of the way, but I have a feeling I'm going to be seriously proud of myself and this novel when and if I finish it.

Will it be good? No clue.
Will my CP's think I've lost my damn mind? Quite possibly.
Will my agent think it's crap? God I hope not.
Will psychological thrillers replace straight romance as my Ben andJerry's? I highly doubt it


But I tried something new, and that in itself feels pretty good. You know... when it's not making me want to go on a murderous rampage. And if it doesn't work out, I can still rock a contemporary romance like it's my birthday (I hope).

What about you, peeps? Have you ever stepped outside your writing comfort zone? Were you glad you did it? (And what are your thoughts on the current stigma against paranormal?)

When Do You Find Time To Write?

I've blogged before about the difficulties of finding time to write in the midst of everything else happening in life.

I've always felt like a big phony for dedicating so much time to something that might not pay off in the long run. I sit in front of my computer, feeling guilty about pandering to these people in my head instead of dusting my filmy furniture or vacuuming my family room. I go to work every day in pursuit of a paycheck, because I'm well aware that writing may never earn me one (yes, I still feel this way, even being agented), but all I want to do is write while I'm there.

The week before last, I went to Mexico. I wrote on the plane, I wrote in my hotel room, I wrote on the balcony outside with the sound of the ocean in the background. It was writing Nirvana.

Writing on vacation. Quick, someone go tell my agent how
dedicated I am!

The view from our balcony. Poor me, having to look at that
while I wrote!

Wait... Why did I come home?

The swim-up bar. I recommend the Dirty Monkey.

The pool... The one place where I couldn't write, due to sun glare
on my netbook. And the Dirty Monkeys didn't help, either.

*THEN* something awesome happened when I got home - our system crashed for 3 days at work, and I literally could not do my job. So, I wrote instead.

Unfortunately, it doesn't happen very often that I'm handed writing time on a silver platter like this. But even with all my doubts and demons and obligations, I'm going to find a way. Because it's what I love, plain and simple. (And also, because the idea for book #4 was born while I was in Mexico. Weee!!!)

For more on this subject, (and for a quick live peek at the view from my hotel room) check out my vlog below. And then tell me -  when do you find time to write?

AMAZING NEWS!

PEEPS!

I was in Mexico last week, and I'd planned to post a vlog I recorded while I was there, and maybe some pictures. Instead, I have something way better.

One of my dear critique partners, Leigh Ann Kopans, HAS SCORED HERSELF A KICKASS AGENT!

Leigh Ann and I have been CP's for a year this month (I was her first, guys. Be jealous.), and our journeys to agentedhood have been very similar.

We read each other's first novels. Ripped them apart, shined them up and polished them, queried our hearts out with them, got *so close* to yes with the last agents who read them, and then gave each other virtual hugs when we knew it was ultimately time to put those ms's in the drawer.

Then we wrote our second  novels.

Fell madly in love with them. Ripped them apart, shined them up and polished them, queried our hearts out, and got seriously down when the responses were less than stellar. Then we entered contests (separate ones) that changed everything. Sent each other frantic text messages and tweets and e-mails and threw in a couple phone calls in for good measure.

Proved nothing is impossible

So now the next step of the journey begins for both of us, and I am so thrilled and lucky to have my writing bestie and favorite cheerleader at my (virtual) side for it. Leigh Ann has worked her ass off to get to this moment, and no one deserves it more.

You can read Leigh Ann's story in her own words here. Please go congratulate her and wish her the best of luck with ONE, the novel that wowed her agent :)

Discussing Inspiration Vloggy Style

Hey all, how was your weekend?

Mine was hectic. I did find a few minutes to put together a vlog for the series my CP's have put together, and I'm posting it here. The question I'm answering is: What inspires your work?

I really wanted it to be a cool vlog, with pictures and videos or SOME sort of visual aid incorporated within, but alas, in the battle of Gina vs. Technology, Technology beat me to a bloody pulp.

So,  I give you three minutes of an extreme close-up on my face, which ranges from pissy (because technology defeated me) to swoony (because hello, I'm talking about GILBERT BLYTHE!)

Also, I THOUGHT I'd at least figured out how to tag pictures on to the end of the video, but I was wrong. So here are the Anne/Gilbert pics I wanted to include, but was too stupid to figure out how:

Gilbert is whispering "Hey, Carrots" in this photo. Anne
is ignoring him...

...So he pulls her hair. And she proceeds
to smash her writing tablet over his head. Priceless.

And in the end, it all comes down to this swoon-worthy moment.
*Sigh*

GILBERT I LOVE YOU!

Avoidance by Writing

Ok, be honest. Does anyone else out there avoid writing with... more writing?

I've noticed a bit of a trend when I don't want to start a project, and also when I don't want to finish one.

When I was writing my 2nd manuscript, I already had an idea for a third simmering in my head. I wrote down some basic plot points, but I didn't want to start the actual story until I'd finished #2, and could better wrap my head around a new character with a different voice. Which was fine, because the characters in #3 didn't seem to be talking much.

Then, I hit the home stretch with #2. On the morning of the day I knew I'd probably finish it, something happened.

My mc from #3 wouldn't shut up.

I know now, and probably that day, if I'm being honest, that this happened because I didn't want to finish #2. I adored the characters, I loved my kissing scenes, and I genuinely enjoyed spending time with it.

But finishing means the honeymoon is over. It means it's time for your betas to point out all the flaws, time for agents to tell you sorry, it's not for me. Time to revise and edit and wonder what you saw in the damn thing in the first place.

So I let myself get lost in #3, if only to avoid the giant pink unfinished elephant in the room.

The same thing happened yesterday. I was off from work, and had every intention of writing #3 like a mofo. But after only 300 words, what did I wind up doing instead? Editing and querying #2 some more. (Which paid off with a couple requests, so woohoo!)

Does this happen to anyone else? Or when you're trying to avoid a project, do you run screaming from the computer altogether?

Perseverance on Paper

I've done blog posts before about my struggles with infertility, but I've been thinking a lot lately about the parallels between trying to have a baby and trying to get a book published.

In both cases, you do everything you possibly can to ensure the outcome you want:

Writing
-You decide you want to be published
-You write a book, you let your CP's hack it to pieces, you put it back together again to give yourself the best chance.
-Rinse, lather, and repeat with your query letter and synopsis.
-You send your book out into the agent world and hope someone somewhere in that sea of queries finds yours, falls madly in love with it, and elevates it from slush to published book

Conceiving:
-You decide you want a baby
-You figure out your cycle, pee on ovulation sticks, take your temperature etc. to give yourself the best chance
-Rinse, lather and repeat each month
-You drag your spouse into the bedroom even when you're both exhausted and completely uninterested, in the hope that one bumbling sperm out of a billion will somehow find your egg, fertilize it, and make it become a baby

For some people, the journey through both processes is fairly easy and minimally bumpy. For others, one might be a lot easier than the other.

But I'm going to be blatantly honest when I say it gets extremely hard to fail at both simultaneously. There's a line in a Matchbox 20 song that says Sometimes you can still lose even if you really try, and I often feel like the personification of that line.

I've been trying to have a baby since 2008. Since then I've been through 3 specialists, numerous tests and procedures, 2 surgeries, and 2 heartbreaking miscarriages.

I've also been trying to get published since 2010. Since then I've written two manuscripts, been through numerous query rejections, 2 partial rejections, and 2 full rejections. I have a partial and 2 fulls out with ms #2, and those could very well end up rejections, too.

In both endeavors, I've come so close, but no cigar. And I'm not writing this post because I'm pregnant - I'm not - or because I got over the wall and I'm about to get published. No dice there, either. But I am writing it to say that the best way to ensure that neither of these things will happen is to give up trying.

I'm not even saying that giving up is a bad thing, if it's what a person needs to do to salvage their sanity. But I am saying that if you want something badly enough... you don't give up.

And I sure as hell have moments when I want to. But then I look at this:

Basically, these temperature charts are the last two years of my life on paper. Each sheet has 3 charts, and each chart represents one menstrual cycle.

Out of the 24 cycles represented on these pages, I was only able to get pregnant in ONE of them.
People around me have had two and three children in this amount of time. And you bet your ass it's discouraging.

BUT-  had  I not been trying, it probably wouldn't have happened at all. And yes, the pregnancy may have ended in miscarriage, but at least I know I can get there. Now, it's a matter of making it stick.

It's the same with writing.

There are only so many times you can get thisclose and watch people around you succeed with a fraction of the effort before you want to throw yourself on the ground and scream. To which I say, go right ahead. You've earned it.

But just because one person succeeds on cycle #2 or query #2 doesn't mean that another person can't succeed on cycle #200 or query #200. It just means that if you stop trying to get there, you never will.

So until you stop wanting it, never stop trying to get it.

The Rejection That Restored My Faith

I know it sounds weird, but I'm floating on a cloud from a rejection I received yesterday.

Back in December, I sent out the final set of queries for my first novel, Life Before Death. I didn't expect anything to come of them. I'd had a few requests, but all my subs were rejected via feedback-less form R's.

So when I got an email in January requesting a partial, I sent off the first five chapters expecting more of the same. But a couple weeks later I was pleasantly surprised when the agent's assistant wrote back asking for the full manuscript. Realizing it was probably my last chance with this ms, I spent 2-1/2 hours proofreading and revising before sending it off - but still, I expected nothing.

In the mean time, I threw all my love and energy into revising WiP #2 and started to send off queries. And as my CP's can tell you, it isn't going well.

Responses seem to be taking forever, and the ones that have come back are all form rejections. I couldn't, and still can't, figure out what I'm doing wrong, especially when I'm querying agents who claim to want the kind of story I've written.

Yesterday morning, another query response for #2 showed up in my inbox and -yup, you guessed it- a form rejection. I admit, I swore at my computer screen. Then did a little more copious whining to my CP's, lamenting that if I ONLY KNEW WHAT THE PROBLEM WAS, I'd fix it.

But alas, I'd never once received feedback on a rejection, and I didn't see the pattern changing any time soon.

Then, around 6:00 last night, the assistant who'd contacted me about Life Before Death e-mailed me. I steeled  myself, ready for another unhelpful form rejection. When I read "Thank you for your interest in our agency," I thought that was exactly what I got.

But then she went on to say how much she and the agent enjoyed the manuscript, and how lovely the ending was. To which my reaction was, Wait, what? She read all the way to the end??

Peeps, she most certainly did. She went on to tell me exactly what she loved about the ms, and the things that worked - and didn't work, which ultimately led to their passing on it.

And even though she passed, the fact that she took the time to offer such thorough, helpful, and kind feedback put me on cloud nine. Sure, my beloved first novel is going back in a drawer, for now. But someone had found it worthwhile enough - thought it DIDN'T SUCK ENOUGH - to tell me how I could make it even better - all while using words like "lovely" and "clever" and "multi-dimensional."

It was a rejection, but it's the best I've felt about my writing in a long time.

So now I can say with certainty that there ARE agents out there who will care about your work, and who will pay attention to what you've created. And then, even if they don't take you on, they'll tell you why with more than just a generic, "Sorry, not right for me."

And that is how a rejection restored my faith in the publishing world. Amen.

Origins Blogfest!

Today I'm participating in the Origins Blogfest!

The object is to talk about when and how you first became a writer. So here goes:

I'm pretty sure I've been writing stories ever since I knew how to write. I've mentioned before that I was the dorky kid who brought books to parties and picnics, because I'd rather lose myself in a made up story than face the boring reality around me.

Which is probably why my earliest stories were kicked-up versions of every day life.

In 2nd (or was it 3rd?) grade, my friend Bridget and I decided to write stories about each other. We used to dictate plot lines to one another - she wanted to go on vacation in France and have Tom Cruise's look-alike son fall madly in love with her, and I'd give her an equally outlandish scenario - and then we'd bury our noses in our notebooks and write as much as we could without getting caught by the teacher. When we were finished, we'd swap notebooks and read and giggle and put in our orders for what we wanted to happen next.

If only life were really that easy, right?

So that's where it all began. We may not get to dictate our own life events (at least not all the time), but the ability to create and lose myself in a world where I call the shots (or at least where no one does boring things like go to work 8 hours a day and clean the house and cook dinner) is what keeps me writing to this day.

Looking forward to reading about your Origins!

The Things We Do For Love (Of Writing)

As many of us here in the blogosphere are unpublished and/or unagented writers, I know you often feel the way I do: like we have to beg, steal, cheat, and borrow time just to get any writing done.

For example, I spent almost my whole Sunday cooking. Not because I love to cook - in fact, I freaking hate it. But the only thing worse than spending one day of my weekend turning out chicken and pizza is coming home at night from my full time job and having to do it then - five days a week.

Having a full time job is a huge time-suck in itself. I readily admit that I'll critique or write in my downtime at work, but lately that downtime has been scarce. So, by turbo-cooking this weekend, I hoped to make up for those lost minutes when I get home instead.

I've also been known:

To let my furniture go un-dusted and my family room go un-vacuumed for weeks at a time so I can squeeze in writing-related things on the weekend

To completely tune out my husband to the point where he accuses me of not loving him (yeah, he's dramatic) when I'm really into writing a scene or reading something amazing my CP's have sent me

To stop everything, whatever it is I'm doing, to tweet on of my CP's about a song that reminded me of one of their ms's

To avoid hanging out with real people in order to spend time with the ones in my head and on my computer. Yes, I'm serious

And why do I do all this? Because until I figure out a way to get paid for doing what I love, this is the way it has to be - or I'll be miserable.

What about you, peeps? What crazy things do you do for your love of writing?

What You Get When Writing is on My S**t List

I'm just gonna say it: I'm hating on my WiP in a major way right now.

So I've decided I'm going to spotlight some of my OTHER favorite things, namely ones that never make me miserable. And some of which look damn good shirtless. Here goes:

1) Hotties




Have I mentioned my massive crush
on Tom Welling? A few hundred times?
'Kay, just checking



Oh, heeeey James Marsden, heeeey

Let's see some fancy swordwork, Prince Charming.

2) Fudge Brownie Sundaes

3) Chocolate Chip Cookies

4) The Beach

5) Newport, Rhode Island

6) My Ipod

And lastly, my CP's and their stories. I basically have the best crit group ever, and I am so lucky to know them and to get to read their beautiful writing. So much that I can still wave my pom poms for them, even when I want to take my own ms and flush it down the toilet.

So peeps, do you have have days when you hate on your writing? What are the other things that keep you going?

The First Thing at Christmas That's Such a Pain to Me...

.... is finding a Christmas Tree

I hope you've all heard this song, otherwise my title makes no sense and I just sound like a huge Grinch.

I'll be honest. Last year I did not have any Christmas spirit. I had a miscarriage on December 17th, in the middle of Christmas shopping no less, and it ruined the holiday for me. This year I'm trying very hard to recapture the all-out fanatical zeal I once had for the holiday, but so far, between overpriced gifts, crowded stores, and shopping with The Gift Nazi my husband, all I've managed are a few brief flickers of enthusiasm.

It doesn't help that my query stats grow more and more abysmal by the day:
Queries Sent: 47
Requests for Material: 2 partials, 1 full - all rejected
Unanswered: 17
The rest? All big, fat R's

So, in actuality, I couldn't wait to go pick out a Christmas tree. Every year we go to beautiful Maple Row Tree Farm in Easton, CT, and to me it's like getting lost in a fairy tale. There are acres and acres of hills and ponds and trees of every variety, and the fresh air clears my head of all Grinchly thoughts. At least for a while.

I mean, look at it!

So what if we walked around for over an hour and I'm so badly out of shape that it left me sore?

So what if my socks were falling down inside my boots the entire time?

So what if no one wants the book I poured my heart and soul into? I'm writing another one!

For the hour we were there, that was honestly how I felt. And then we get the sucker home, and reality hits.

The stupid needles everywhere! My pain in the ass, Type A husband repositioning the tree thirty thousand times until it's perfectly straight and centered (and insisting I'm a terrible judge of both)! Those stupid, STUPID needles!

And exactly why did I kill a tree and drag into our living room when I could've been writing my neglected WiP instead?

Oh wait. This is why:

I suppose it's all worth it in the end. But yeah, my Christmas spirit still needs a few minor adjustments.

How about you? Are you full of Holiday Cheer, or could you use a jump start? (Or a trip to the tree farm?)