A Desperate Attempt at Productivity Disguised As A Live Blog

Good Morning, Y'all.

The last time I attempted a live blog to show how little time I have to write and be productive, I somehow wound up being... pretty productive. So this morning, when I woke up feeling exhausted and overwhelmed with no idea where to start, I thought I'd try this again in hopes that history will repeat itself.

Here are my goals for today, in no particular order:

- Write at least 1000 words, in spite of the fact that this ms hates me and the characters act like they're too cool to talk to me.
- Pay bills
- Have some photos of my son printed up for my sister-in-law
- Go to the post office
- Finish making my mother's Christmas gift
- Order Christmas gifts for various peeps
- Cook dinner
- Unload the dishwasher

And here's how things are starting out:

5 a.m. - Husband's alarm woke me up, which it usually doesn't. My first attempt at cracking my eyelids apart tells me they're puffy and in no mood to be open. I try in vain to fall back to sleep as my husband gets ready for work.

5:30 a.m. - Husband is in the kitchen, VERY NOISILY loading the dishwasher. I jump out of bed to tell him I'll do it later, when the baby is AWAKE, thank you. He runs it anyway.

6:15 a.m. - Remember that thing about the baby being awake? Yeah. He starts stirring as soon as my husband opens the garage door to leave for work.

7:00 a.m. - Still haven't fallen back to sleep, and the baby is now full-on babbling in his crib. I get up to wash my face and brush my teeth.

7:30 a.m. - Baby is lying in his crib, just chilling. I'm washed up. My hair is combed, but still looks like a wild rat's nest. Since I can't hide under a blanket and avoid Monday altogether, I decide to live blog.

That leads us to now. I'm about to go get my son from his crib. Be back in a bit.....

8:50 a.m. - Baby is changed and fed. Which sounds so easy. But, like his mother, the boy does NOT like to be kept waiting for food. He does this the entire time I'm prepping it:

But at the first sign of pancakes in front of him, suddenly:

And somehow, he still thinks he can fool me with those crocodile tears.

As for me, I'm currently getting ready to eat my breakfast while he watches a video in his playroom (the disaster area you see behind the high chair), and order some photos online via Walgreens. Excuse me, pancakes await....

9:40 a.m. -  I'm fed, dishwasher is unloaded, prints are ordered. I've donned my SAHM uniform of yoga pants and a sweatshirt. I even went as far as to put on some concealer, because that 5 a.m. wake up call is written all over my face, in the form of horrendous bags under my eyes.

I am gross today, guys. My hair, my face, my clothes. I am the total package of grossness. And that's *after* putting in a modicum of effort, which makes it especially depressing. But, my errands aren't going to run themselves, so I'll just brace myself as I prepare to go out in public....

12:12 p.m. - Baby and I went to Walgreens and the post office. Discovered it is freakishly warm outside compared to yesterday's downpouring coldness. Which is awesome, except it made getting a 23-pound kid in and out of his car seat and stroller 4 separate times while overdressed extra fun. Plus he decided to kick his shoe off as we were leaving both places.

Had some time to kill before lunch when we got home, so I took the baby for a walk around the neighborhood. Currently we're in my office, and he's pulling at me and whining as I write this. Just turned around to find he'd dumped a bunch of stuff in the middle of the floor. Don't even know where he got it from. Guess it's time for lunch....

1:30 p.m. - Both baby and I have had our lunches. We Face Timed with my mother, who's working from home today. He's in a clean diaper and DOWN FOR HIS NAP AT LAST! The dirty dishes piled up in my sink are giving me anxiety, but I'm not going to touch them. I never know how long these precious napping moments will last, and with 10K left to write, I can't afford to waste any.

2:50 p.m. - 490 words written. The lawn service for my neighbor across the street just started making a huge racket in their front yard with a machine that sounds like 50 chainsaws buzzing simultaneously. I'm sweating bullets that they're going to wake up my son.

And also eating ice cream, because if he wakes up, at least I've had ice cream.

4:15 p.m. - BABY IS UP AND MY WORD COUNT GOAL HAS BEEN MET! 1051 words total. I know it's not a lot, but for a pokey drafter like me, it's a victory!

8:25 p.m. - I read a bunch of books to the baby, then fed him dinner. I LOVE that he now picks his favorite books from his collection and brings them to me to read to him. It makes my authorly AND my motherly hearts happy.

Next I made dinner for my husband and me while Andrew watched Shrek in his playroom. I ate my food where he couldn't see me, otherwise he would've gone into full-on mooch mode. My husband was not nearly as wise.

I also washed all the dishes and wiped down all the counters while my husband played with our son, because it stresses me out to go to bed knowing there are dirty things in need of cleaning in the sink. Then we brushed the baby's teeth and put him to bed. Now I need to get in the shower, maybe write some more, then read a little to wind down for bed.

Oh, and I ate more ice cream. Because tomorrow, I'll need to start all over again.

Hope YOU had a productive day too, Peeps! Feel free to tell me about it!